The black dog likes me far too much.

I have done nothing today.

Nothing at all.

I have had no extraordinary thoughts.

Done nothing extraordinary.

Today has been me doing my usual – sitting on the couch watching TV (Doctor Who). I have written my articles and done nothing of consequence.

I’m starting to think I am a waste of space.

I’ve done nothing with my life and I’m actually sick of looking for a job. Sick of applying for jobs. Sick of doing it all myself. I wish I could hire someone to actually do it all for me. But I have no money. So technically they would have to do it for free.

Losing motivation  is the worst. I wonder where it comes from?

When I started work, it was barely there, but after about a week I found some. I had it for several months, but it’s gone again.

I just looked through all my sent mail and there are so many applications in there. Many I have never heard from. Then of course there are all the ones that I’ve applied for through TradeMe or Fairfax or Seek.

It’s so absurd to be complaining about this. Because yes, I am whining. Whine. Whine. Whine.

I’ve put in so much effort over the last few months and getting nothing for it. Why. Even. Bother.

Blerg. Yeah – bad mood Reesa is back.